15 years ago, 10 years from now

In this photo, from the left is John, Russ (not a subject of this blog post), Rick and me. Like my bandanna?

Christmas brought one of my long-time friends back to Utah and although he was busy with family, he made a request of me and two other friends that we clear an afternoon and a night and participate with him in a ritual almost forgotten 15 years before.

All of us were unmarried back then and all of us were friends collectively and in every combination of pairs or triplicates that you can concoct. Brad (the returning friend - not pictured above) had a video class in those days in college and we made some movies to fulfill his assignments and had fun in the meantime.

Making use of some of that equipment we interviewed and video taped each other back then about our lives and our futures and hopes and dreams. We gathered again, 15 years later (instead of the intended 10) to have another taping session. Brad, John, Rick and I scheduled time away from the family and met together to do just that. Ideally we might have reviewed the old tape but one interview was lost and we watched a couple of the old college movie assignments (and wow did I have long hair) and proceeded with our updated interviews.

We are in interesting mix: A self-employed business owner (Rick), a world-traveling, high-level project manager (Brad) for an electronics retailer that all readers would know, a mechanical engineer (John) and this humble blogger. All of us married, none ever divorced (but with at least two close calls) and all with at least one offspring, all home owners and doing about what almost-40 people scattered around the middle-class demographic charts do. After a really pleasing dinner at Stoneground, we retired to tape ourselves for our personal history.

I learned a lot listening and talking and I can't begin to hope to put it all in one post. It was easy for the four of us to talk about deep and personal things, explore corners of our lives that few ever get a glimpse into and to put our thoughts about our pasts and futures down. I learned that we still trust each other and that our friendship never misses a beat despite the space of months or years between visits. There were no uncomfortable moments or uncertainty; we were as we always have been. When we do get together in larger groups with friends and family in tow, we still relate but not at the same level. Different social dynamics appropriately color how we interact.

The interviews have played across my mind a lot since they happened and I found the whole experience revelatory and inspiring, especially the subject of the future. We all agreed to meet in 2019 to take stock of our lives again. It makes me want to be better and to do more. Not to impress my friends but to make good use of my life. I think I may use the method with my children to record their lives and personalities and their visions of the future. I will refer to this event often for the next few months but I believe the experience was subtly and importantly life-changing.